‘It’s Not Just Burnout:’ How Grind Culture Fails Women

Rachel Hislop: “I’ve seen this tweet shared over the last few weeks, and it is a beautiful proclamation about an alternative way to consider being.”

RH: “To understand how this changing world affects women, we first have to know where we are and how we got here. This piece is a great primer that helps dig into the ties between the pandemic and its altering effect on attitudes towards work and happiness. Come for the Richard Scarry Busytown descriptors; stay for the stats.”

RH: “This piece takes a critical look at burnout culture by definition and holds it against C-PTSD, a medical condition that results from long-term trauma. As the country’s mental health and happiness rates decline, I am always interested in conversations that push us to think a little more about how buzzy terms often blanket profound truths.”

RH: “Data tells us stories where words may fail. And this McKinsey report is a great place to start for the cold hard stats on how COVID has impacted the lives of women in the workforce.”

RH: “Why are we so tired? It’s because we’ve deprived ourselves of engaging in all seven types of rest. Physician and award-winning author Saundra Dalton-Smith reveals why we are chronically tired despite getting the requisite amount of sleep.”

RH: “Few television scenes have stuck with me like this ‘Fleabag’ monologue by Kristin Scott Thomas as Belinda. At first, it seems like a poignant talk about menopause, but it’s really about women and our natural relationship to pain. I revisit this scene when I try to make sense of the many parts of this world built without women in mind.”

RH: “As I’ve tried to find new meaning outside of holding a big job title, Toni Morrison’s quote rings as a welcome command: ‘You are not the work you do; you are the person you are.’ It reminds me that work is simply a job, inside of a career, and a career is inside of a singular life with many more uses than merely producing.”

RH: “This piece has done its rounds in my group chats. The tropes of Black excellence, Black Girl Magic, and ‘strong Black women,’ have, in the end, misaligned perspectives and have forced us to tie our worth to how much we can endure. A step back from this thinking is a step towards a reimagining of identity and our relationship to the world.”

RH: “Kelley Bonner was my undergrad professor before she pivoted to being a burnout specialist. Her podcast is an under-the-radar gem dedicated to helping women manage the stress of daily living. I admire the way she navigates topics like quitting with grace and opting into softness.”

RH: “Tricia Hersey is the founder of The Nap Ministry, an organization that examines the liberating power of naps. It ties back to rest as a spiritual practice, a racial justice issue, and a social justice issue. I love Tricia’s approach towards life, rest, community, and a reimagination of being. And I especially love her taking up space in a column that usually platforms women who ‘get it done’ through overwork.”

RH: “When I am drawn to read about love, it always brings me back to bell hooks, specifically her examinations about what it means to live in a society rooted in a love ethic. This essay introduces her ideals around love which is a necessary stepping stone towards imagining a new future.”

RH: “This piece by Saeed Jones is a brief but deeply moving exploration of the expansiveness of friendship. Shifts can happen personally, but friendships hold a particular type of ease and softness that should be centered with the same zeal as professional endeavors.”

RH: “We spend a lot of time pontificating the value of life as if we have forever to live it. Once we get clear about mortality, prioritization becomes clearer. This note, written by 27-year-old Holly Butcher the day before she died of a rare form of cancer in 2018, is an excellent reminder of how we balance the days we have left to live.”

RH: “The first time I did the wheel of life exercise, I felt exposed. Mapping out where you spend your energy and where you feel fulfilled can be a critical step towards building a new vision for the future. And it helps you realize it’s less about harmonious perfection in all areas of our lives, and more about being intentional in the care and effort we give to the whole.”

RH: “This one is a wildcard, but stay with me! It chronicles the 1975 ‘Thrilla in Manila’ match between Muhammad Ali and Joe Frazier. Outside of it being a beautifully descriptive piece of journalism about a scene as gruesome as a boxing match, it ends with a quote from the people’s champ, Ali, contemplating his personal ‘why.’ The quote is a reminder that sometimes the things that seem the hardest allow you a new vantage point on your abilities and purpose.”

RH: “While I was doing research for this collection, The Cut released a series of stories about life after the pandemic. This essay about the loss of ambition was a perfect culmination of the links above and a very welcome ‘ah, I am not alone’ moment. I know the token rule of the Internet is to not read the comment section, but make an exception here; the comments are almost as rich as the essay.”