Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here or post it in the Slate Parenting Facebook group. My daughter, “Amanda,” is 12.
Every moment? Do you remember the little years? The tantrums, the carseat battles, the poopy diapers, the 5:30 wake-ups? Not enjoyable moments. Sanctifying and rewarding, yes, but enjoyable? The years may fly by, but the days typically crawl.
Care and Feeding is Slate’s parenting advice column. Have a question for Care and Feeding? Submit it here or post it in the Slate Parenting Facebook group. Our 5-year-old son recently started kindergarten. Every Wednesday, he gets a homework packet.
Modern Love in miniature, featuring reader-submitted stories of no more than 100 words. In Massachusetts, if you’re divorcing and have children under 18, you must complete a parenting program.
Tales of wicked stepmothers may be common in storybooks, but they are often a far cry from reality. Despite the potential challenges with step-parenting, many children develop close bonds with their mum or dad’s new partner.
Ashton Kutcher's kids aren't getting his money. In a recent episode of the Dax Shepard podcast "Armchair Expert," Kutcher said he wasn't creating trust funds for his two children with his wife, Mila Kunis, Mitch Tuchman reported for MarketWatch.
Earlier this year, I wrote about teaching empathy, and whether you are a parent who does so. The idea behind it is from Richard Weissbourd, a Harvard psychologist with the graduate school of education, who runs the Making Caring Common project, aimed to help teach kids to be kind.
“I will not cut my hair. Never. The answer is never, Mom, and the answer will always be never, so you should just stop asking me.” He said it without attitude, in a matter-of-fact way, as though he were simply reporting on the weather or time of day.
What parent doesn't want their child to do well in school, stay out of trouble, and grow up to be a highly successful adult? But as I've found over the years raising my own daughter, that's far easier said than done.
In a piece in The Conversation, Bernadette Saunders described positive discipline. Parents who practise positive discipline or gentle parenting use neither rewards nor punishments to encourage their children to behave.
Back when I was six years old, the neighborhood I lived in provided the perfect backdrop for an active and idyllic childhood. Half a dozen other boys about my age lived on the same street I did and we quickly banded together to form a little neighborhood gang.
I am the father of two boys, Griffin (14) and Huck (12). They are awesome: bright, curious, funny, and kindhearted. Like any parent, I would love to believe that my awesome kids are a result of my awesome parenting. Sadly, expert opinion indicates it ain't so. Genes have an enormous influence.
Julie Lythcott-Haims noticed a disturbing trend during her decade as a dean of freshmen at Stanford University. Incoming students were brilliant and accomplished and virtually flawless, on paper. But with each year, more of them seemed incapable of taking care of themselves.
Audrey's piano teacher was standing in front of me, giving her honest assessment. Her eyes were kind, and her voice soft, but my parental guilt turned her statement into a question. One I couldn't answer. So I just faked a diarrhea attack and ran to the restroom.
I generally am quite an optimistic person. I tend to believe that everything will work out for the best unless the evidence is overwhelmingly to the contrary, and anyone who knows me will tell you that I am not prone to drama.
Ask parents how important it is to instill kindness in their kids, and most will rank it high: even as their very top priority, according to Harvard researchers.
Below you'll find a nifty infographic produced by the folks at Yellowbrick detailing the consequences of everyone's favorite irritating childrearing trend: helicopter parenting.
ALONG with its Nordic neighbours, Sweden features near the top of most gender-equality rankings. The World Economic Forum rates it as having one of the narrowest gender gaps in the world. But Sweden is not only a good place to be a woman: it also appears to be an idyll for new dads.
New parenthood is a desperate search for certainty: When you start knowing nothing, you are desperate to know something. And when you finally figure that something out—how to get this creature to eat or sleep—that becomes the answer.
About 25 years ago, when the era of irrational exuberance allowed enough disposable income for irrational anxiety, the concept of “helicopter parenting” arose. A “helicopter parent” micromanages every aspect of his child’s routine and behavior.
I know many people want to stay current with the latest parenting trends -- attachment parenting, minimalist parenting, Tiger Mother parenting, et al. Well, I've stumbled upon a new technique that will guarantee your child grows up to be an exemplary student and citizen.
“Initially, helicopter parenting appears to work,” says Julie Lythcott-Haims, author of How to Raise an Adult. “As a kid, you're kept safe, you're given direction, and you might get a better grade because the parent is arguing with the teacher.
X marks the spot! This Dad devised a genius plan that could save your teen from a dangerous situation. As a parent, we never stop worrying about our children. The day they’re born we count all 10 fingers and all 10 toes, and then we count them over again.
What if every time your child cries or tantrums, they are actually doing something highly worthwhile? We don't always appreciate it when our children begin to cry, but what they are actually doing is making use of the body's innate recovery system.
BEAUTY opens many doors. Study after study has concluded that the comely earn more, are better liked, are treated more indulgently and are even given more lenient sentences in court than their plainer counterparts. The door it opens widest, though, is the romantic one.
If permission to stop parenting sounds like the solution to surviving the rest of the summer holidays, then Alison Gopnik is your saviour. The US psychology professor and grandmother of three thinks too much “parenting” risks ruining your relationship with your children.
Just a few days ago, I saw a three-year-old wandering around at 10:30 at night and wondered if he was lost or jet-lagged. The parent came over and explained that they believed in children setting their own sleep schedule. The problem with this approach is that it may work, or it may not.
Before we commence with the festivities, I wanted to thank everyone for helping my first book become a Wall Street Journal bestseller. To check it out, click here. Every parent asks it at some point: What is going on in my kid’s brain?
Overparenting is widely recognized as a problematic approach to raising kids. For nearly a decade, studies have shown how the rise of the "helicopter parent" has been worsening children's anxiety and school performance in the K-12 years.
Mocking obsessive parents is fun. But their excesses are small compared to the parenting failures in so many homes. Mocking obsessive parents is fun. But their excesses are small compared to the parenting failures in so many homes.
Raising kids in today's world is no easy task. From warnings about too much screen time and too many food additives, to the pressure to help your child succeed in school and on the sports field, parenting has become more challenging than ever.
In many countries, children have the very freedoms that American parents can grant only by chafing against law or custom, our international readers say.
It is there in the quick steps of a woman hurrying up the street in Brooklyn, muttering to herself, “I’m a good parent, I’m a good parent.” She was regretting letting her son run home alone from a restaurant and was rushing to catch up with him.
My five-year-old is extravagantly furious at being thwarted. I have infringed her human rights by mildly suggesting that she turn off the television and put some clothes on. To which I reply, swift as Lady Macbeth’s dagger, “I never was your friend in the first place, darling.
Throughout this year we’ve been running a series on how to father with intentionality and create a positive family culture. Whenever we’ve written on this topic, we invariably get comments from some men who have decided to opt out of the marriage and kids route altogether.
‘I think my child has been breastfed by another woman,” my friend Jennifer announces out of the blue in the middle of our kids’ play-date. Even for California, where we live, this is mind-bogglingly weird. For a start, Jennifer’s daughter Alice is two and a half.
Raising children is a lot of work, so who can blame parents that look for tips and tricks to make it all a little easier? Sadly, not all life hacks are as useful as they seem. Here’s what happens when 25 of the most popular parenting hacks are attempted.
Today’s parents are empirically less likely to allow kids to explore their neighborhood alone, walk to school, play by themselves, and handle potentially dangerous tools or weapons, and more likely to closely supervise all of their children’s activities, than parents even one generation ago.
Parenting is one of the hardest jobs in the world. There are so many things that can affect a child's success, including socioeconomic status, the environment they live in, and their parents' education level.
When Phil Graves, a father of three young girls, worked for Deloitte, his days looked a lot like those of many working professionals. He left before the kids were up to commute to work in San Francisco.
Before I had kids, I thought I knew everything there was to know about them. I did, after all, graduate from college with a degree in Family Science. During those college years, my life was filled with classes about human development, parenting, psychology, family dynamics, and marriage.
Treating an adult like a child, or infantilization, creates a cycle of dependence in which the adult constantly needs to be told what to do and how to do it.
There are two great defining features of child-rearing today. First, children are now praised to an unprecedented degree. As Dorothy Parker once joked, American children aren’t raised; they are incited. They are given food, shelter and applause. That’s a thousand times more true today.
Our politicians talk a lot about “families”, but what do they really mean when they use this term? What does a modern Australian family look like and how does it compare with ten, 20 or even 30 years ago?
You're going on a family road trip with your adult siblings. Which of these three scenarios sounds most like you? 1.
Imagine that you’ve been invited to the birthday party of a distant cousin you haven’t seen in over a decade. You know her age, gender and what she does for a living, but not much more than that. With this information, how will you go about buying the perfect birthday present for her?
Today’s parents are perpetually urged to monitor their children’s feelings, focus on the child and essentially make their children their entire focus. There’s a downside to this, argues Harvard psychologist Richard Weissbourd.
A backlash to overprotective parenting is answered with hammers and saws on an adventure playground — one element of the "free-range parenting" movement.
But the "rules are bad" trope is, unfortunately, a trend in The Netherlands. Parents that live by this rule are sacrificing themselves. It's bad parenting. I see a lot of parents (mothers mostly) in public places desperately trying to explain their dissatisfaction to their misbehaving children.
Do you believe that two people can be made to fall in love with each other – any two people in this world? Arthur Aron, a psychology professor started a study on whether two people could decide to fall in love with each other.
Five months after Todd Bedrick’s daughter was born, he took some time off from his job as an accountant. The company he works for, Ernst & Young, offered paid paternity leave, and he decided to take six weeks — the maximum amount — when his wife, Sarah, went back to teaching.
I'm spending the morning waiting for my car in the repair shop. Four men in flannel (I missed the flannel memo) and I sit around smelling tires and inhaling exhaust fumes while an enchanting little fairy is in constant motion around her daddy.
It happened yet again. As I was sitting at the table for dinner with my children, I noticed my daughter's hand fishing around under her skirt. "We don't play with our vulvas at the table. Go wash your hands and finish your food," I scolded.
Styles are hard to get right on Android. There's a lot of potential for frustration. The hierarchy easily devolves into spaghetti code. How often have you wanted to change a style but feared you might break something unintentionally by doing so?
Harvey Karp, the pediatrician, parenting expert and inventor-slash-entrepreneur, cuts an unimposing figure. Lean and agile, with wispy dark hair, blue-rimmed glasses and a bounce in his step, Karp hugs like the Angeleno he has become and deadpans like the New Yorker he once was.
What does it take to be a good parent? We know some of the tricks for teaching kids to become high achievers. For example, research suggests that when parents praise effort rather than ability, children develop a stronger work ethic and become more motivated.
While it is true that there is no single definition or correct method of raising children, a few parenting tips could go a long way in ensuring the happiness of your child. Let’s take a look at 10 good parenting tips that Sadhguru has for us on raising kids.
Excerpted from HOW TO RAISE AN ADULT: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid for Success by Julie Lythcott-Haims, published June 9, 2015 by Henry Holt and Company, LLC. Copyright © 2015 by Julie Lythcott-Haims. All rights reserved. To What End?
Looking for advice on parenting but don’t want to wade through reams of studies? A new book offers help. In “What Great Parents Do: 75 Simple Strategies for Raising Kids Who Thrive,” Erica Reischer offers practical tips in an easy-to-read format.
Being a parent is an experience as old as the human race. Being a parent in a plugged-in world of intensifying work-life pressures, increasing economic and political uncertainty, and endless "mommy wars"? That's a whole different story.
I am about to tell you something that may shock you. Are you ready? Are you sitting down? Okay. Now let me be clear, it's not that I don't want children right now. It's not that I don't want children until after I'm married, or after I've paid off my student loan debt, or after I've bought a house.
I cherish the notes I receive from my children -- whether they are scribbled with a Sharpie on a yellow sticky note or written in perfect penmanship on lined paper. But the Mother's Day poem I received last spring from my first-born daughter left a profound impact.
Helicopter parents, stop hovering: it’s officially not good for your kids — especially if they’re already grown. A new study in the Journal of Child and Family Studies found that being overly involved in your grownup kids’ lives can do more harm than good.
“Where did we ever get the crazy idea that in order to make children do better, first we have to make them feel worse? Think of the last time you felt humiliated or treated unfairly. Did you feel like cooperating or doing better?” - Jane Nelsen
Russian intercontinental ballistic missiles are believed to carry a total of approximately 1,000 strategic nuclear warheads that can hit the US less than 30 minutes after being launched.
Every parent asks it at some point: What is going on in my kid's brain? And if you don't understand kids it can be hard to give them what they need to thrive. Lately the trend has been helicopter parenting and trying to get them ready as soon as possible for an increasingly competitive world.
In a family home in picture-pretty Oxfordshire, four women and seven toddlers are, respectively, drinking tea and causing chaos. The children, aged between 13 months and four years, are doing what children of those ages do: quarrelling over toys and bellowing for their mothers.
An old friend of mine was on the Internet and came across an article that I had written, so she emailed to say hello. I was glad to hear from her. She and I worked together 11 years ago. We were once close but drifted. I started to write a pro-forma reply.
Did you come to VICE for in-depth coverage of parenting? Good. Read these: A horrifying study published last week in the journal Demography suggests that being a new parent makes you miserable.
What can American parents learn from how other cultures look at parenting? A look at child-rearing ideas in Japan, Norway, Spain — and beyond.